It isn’t. As of separation last Thursday there hasn’t been any. I did look up some anime porn and got it on, but I know better. My thoughts about what I used to think about are all messed up. I could think of him and be ready in a heartbeat.
Now, ugh sometimes I just think of her all over him. What’s the difference between me and her in the bedroom? car? whatever. I just feel it’s ruined physical + emotional intimacy with him.
I can do physical intimacy and just play happy for a few, but the husband says what’s the point if it’s lacking emotionally. Dear readers I wonder if you know where this is going. The thought of him not being able to enjoy sex with me because I’m emotionally distant. Where is the scream emoticon?? Where is it!!
This guy that I married can do his mistress on the sides of highways, in cars, parking lots, and he has to have emotional intimacy to do these things? Hmmm.. the lies blind a person so deep. 2+years he was bumping and grinding all over the worst best friend I have ever had the pleasure of coming across, a woman who lies to her family and friends, a woman who got nothing out of this affair except destruction, and says he needs emotional + physical intimacy from me, because I’m worth more than what he had with her.
I know the man can be sweet, but and there’s a big but how can you do what you did and then have that kind of standard? But he does and he’s standing firm on it. He wants me in love with him before we become physical again. And my physically starved self? Well I guess I’m going to be celibate for awhile. Or maybe I am in love with him and just fighting it?
Any ideas on how to speed up falling in love with someone who stabbed you in the back so many time? so I can get laid again??