So I have a hard time seeing S all over Mark and Mark super enjoying her like she’s awesome. Whatever. But it bugs the hell out of me.. I also have a hard time remembering her here in my house, sitting on my couch, at my dining table, in my room visiting with me. And well Rizzo gave me a solution. It is funny and some may not find the humor in it but I think its hilarious after a few days of processing.
S has cooties and well whenever I think about her in my house just spray it down with Lysol or get my plegde out and wipe down my dining table and chairs and there you have it cootie free.
I laughed it off I said well I cannot spray Mark with Lysol I think that’s unhealthy. Then the conversation went to how she joking puts vodka in her pool to keep her pool cootie free. I told her maybe that’s how I will de-cootiefy Mark by getting a spray bottle full of vodka and spray him down.
Rizzo laughed and said “Well let’s not waste good vodka!”
Oh that woman can make me laugh! Did I spray Mark down? No, I have been thinking about it. However it might contribute to his escapade of last night 😦 Did I spray my house down?.. No.. but the thought gets me to smile and truly push S’s memory out of my life and home. Like a mist I wave my arms and it dissipates into thin air. I seem to be working that that happening with S little by little.
If I think too much about her the memories come back. Just a little at a time I can remove her from my memory bank. Her smile, her mannerisms, the way I picked up some of her phrases
As I was with Books we had a great time at the library. Our children playing and getting along. I said a few phrases S used to say and I caught myself for a second and moved on. I told Books I am finding that this hurt Mark and S cause is such a small circle compared to the big circle of love I have experienced that surrounds this hurt.
So while I get rid of the Cooties, my friendships are blossoming and blooming. I always thought I could say the same about my marriage but I cannot. I hate being married to Mark and love it at the same time… I think it will always be this way just the scale is tipped more on the hate side right now, because through this I never knew there was a scale.