Tears and Jessie

There isn’t much to say but our whole house seemed to be mourning after we got back from Wal-Mart from shopping for Belbee’s (2nd daughter) upcoming birthday.

The boy has been the babysitter and doing a great job, but I think the girls were a bit too much for him tonight.

Anyways needless to say 3/4 children were wound up and crying messes at one moment or another. Then as we all 6 of us settled on the girls room floor just to be together the topic of Jessie came up again. Not from us but from Emily asking about Jessie again. I had said isn’t it wonderful how our family is getting along and getting better. M and I have come along way in 3 months I think, but no where near mended for sure. But our family is together and making it. No more shuffling the kids from one place to another.

Then Emily said then Mom you and Jessie’s Mom can get better. We can see Jessie again? M was there for it and I was glad he was. I have to hear this enough and I saw his face. He looked at mine. Yup not happy.. M said No that is not going to happen and we kissed our precious princesses goodnight.

After I put the baby to sleep I went back in since they were still up. I talked to them more about Jessie. I told them that Jessie’s Mom lied to me and pretended to be my friend. She hurt my heart and it’s starting to heal and I’m working on forgiving her. But I do believe Jessie’s Mom is a child of God and sometimes friends just part ways.

Emily replies “So you want to forget Jessie’s Mom”

Me: I do, right now baby

Emily: Do you want to forget Jessie?

Me: No sweetheart I love Jessie I always will I could never forget her

Emily: So can I invite Jessie to my birthday party?

Me: No I’m sorry you can’t but we can invite Judith, Sidney, etc. naming every other kid we’ve ever come into contact with

Emily and Belbee: Yeah!! and Erin, oh don’t forget Thomas

And hallelujah that was the end to what could have been a horrible conversation.

Because I wanted to be honest with my girls to a point. Yes, one day they will know what their Dad did, but not now. Same with Jessie. M is just as responsible for ruining our children’s friendships.

As I left their room I hugged M and cried. We both did.

All 6 of us are starting to shed tears as a family and honestly I think it’s a good thing. Our children have held it together and didn’t bat an eye when they had to be shuffled to my in-laws every other day. They were upset but they were troopers. They were scared, they didn’t know what was going on we didn’t address their emotions at that time M and I were slowly losing it too. Those sweet blessings held on hope their family would pull together. I swear I would like to say we are going to make it, but I’d be a lying fool to say that right now.

But I do think the feelings are starting to come out. They are starting to feel safe again.

Which can’t be a bad thing..



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