Vacation well kind of?

So we’re all going to Los Angeles and Oregon together on planes

To Disneyland. to BBQ’s to seeing where their Mom used to spend her summers..

Except I was like 100lbs lighter still a little chunk though.

I want to change.. Not sure how, or have evaluated how I fail. But I want to change and be strong.

Like I used to be.

Dang it these stairs are killing me..

So I tried on a ton of cloths in my dresser and all of them most of them do not fit.

Tis life when you eat mass quantities of things.. and lately I’m not regretting it. I touch my sweet fluffy belly fat and think I’m gorgeous. I see myself in the mirror and smile because every cupcake and sugary sweet I wanted so amazingly much.

But it’s strange changing before all of this went down I would have cried and mentally beat myself up.

But not today.. hopefully not ever again.

Anyways enough of my plumpness behavior..

We are going and I’ve stayed up all night.. Not a good way to start a vacation but I had things that needed to be done like my stinky boy’s camp belongings and his laundry.

We would have came home to the funk if that didn’t get done.

Also I need a shower, shave, and just a moment to chill out..

It’s been packing, preparing, and talking about how effectively to leave the island. I’m glad Charles leaves frequently so we know the ferry schedule and all of that.

I am going to focus on relaxing and doing all I can to make sure my minions are comfortable..

Charles and I seem to be doing okay.

I’ve been joking with him about his affair, or I don’t joke and just mention it.

Me: I hate that I shared you.. it’s so icky

Him: Well what’s this talk about an open marriage then?

Me: Well you checked that box already so your always shared

Him: Oh you all or nothing

Me: Yup

Us: Laughing like kids

I want to say I hope we enjoy ourselves..

But the decision lies so much with me it seems and I do have every intention on punching any stupidness in the throat..

Our children are quite fortunate to be able to fly as much as they have been and to see the country..

I will focus on relaxing my shoulders, drinking water and tea.. and chilling the #@^* out and being grateful.. To receive the invitation with new garments, and a peaceful heart 🙂

Literally new garments… LOL!!

Tiil Next time

❤
NH

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7 thoughts on “Vacation well kind of?

  1. I think that’s how I will know I’m doing okay – when I make jokes like that. It’s what I would do in any other awful situation to get through it, so I’m hoping soon I will be able to do that about the affair. You give me some hope!
    Enjoy vacation…maybe I really do need to start planning one for us!

    • You will get there. A year ago I didn’t think I would ever smile spontaneously again. I am still in pain, but I smile again, and even laugh and I do kid about the awful woman my husband had sex with… ew. I tell him he really messed up. If he was going to cheat, the least he could have done was pick someone BETTER than me! Hugs. ❤

      • This is really how I think I will know that I’m okay again. I joke about things that aren’t funny. And this whole situation is ridiculous. If this were a guy friend of mine I would give him so much shit – piercings on her face, no high school diploma, and seriously just not pretty. I hope I can make fun of him one day. I did tell him that if I cheat on him I will not waste it on a downgrade. I’ll make sure I cheat on him with someone way hotter. I have made it clear I am operating under the assumption that I have a free pass I’m hanging on to, and that if I choose to level the playing field, I will not choose some worthless scumbag. I’ll find a hot fireman or something. He just says he is not going anywhere. Hopefully we laugh one day. If you got there, I’m optimistic.

  2. NH, I hope you have a fabulous time. Call me if you are in Portland, I’ll make you guys some cupcakes or something. 🙂 Hugs!!! Oh, eat some of those great cookies they have on Main Street in D-Land for me. YUM!

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