A Fucking Match..

And geesh I don’t feel any better

A yelling match occurred with a bunch of F*BOMBS and well nothing came out of it..

He’s leaving tomorrow and asked me to take him to the airport.

Drop his ass off at the ferry and bye!

What was the yelling about? Same ole’ theory stuff.

I think he was a fake fraud of a person since I met him.

He disagrees and thinks I’m crazy.

I tell him I am not crazy and that is super overgeneralizing and not specifying anything that validates his disagreements..

And it just kept going..

I feel kind of lost tonight.

Last night I totally fought the Porn bug.. I notice I go to it when I’m sad.. or feeling hopeless and I just want to feel good.

I am working on relying on Christ and finding my way to a place where I don’t need porn or anything to help with the pain, sadness, or grief..

I am still missing the husband I trusted..

I’m not sure why or what is making me miss that relationship.

Well here’s to tomorrow and living without him for awhile.

I would like to say that I’m okay with him going out of town and fucking another slutbag.. I don’t want to catch anything.. maybe if I do want to have sex with him we should use condoms when we gets home..

I’m bleeding something terrible and maybe that’s where all the cray comes out.. but what’s done is done..

Here’s to tomorrow..

❤ NH

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