And that makes him so icked out he hates red meat.
Mine was fine..
Em’s was a bit underdone..
But I kept on
He threw his own not to his standard burgers on the grill.
But I was enjoying my burgers and fries.
I didn’t help him.
He’s the type that needs help adulting in the cooking part.
But eh he’s had a wife who catered and felt guilty for not preparing his food right because she’s so darn hard on herself
And now she’s trying not to be but still didn’t work out..
So he hadn’t even ate his burgers and the girls and I were on to dessert.
And he looked so surprise and was like “You guys used to wait for me”
And the girls and I just laughed and they said sorry!
But I didn’t apologize
He put his burgers on the grill more not my fault it was taking forever.
Well it kind of was I told him just throw them on the grill should be hot enough.
It wasn’t and he just kept on..
I would have put them on a pan and fried them up..
but not him.
He sulked I saw him sulk..
But I didn’t care.
I did apologize because I could have helped him and I didn’t.
I didn’t want to and was being selfish.
He could have had a nice dinner even with a set back.. but he didn’t..
I don’t even know why I was being so selfish..
Anyways we kind of made up after that.. but still things are so odd here.
Although the idea of getting to know him again doesn’t piss me off.
Because I can question my value to him and there is really nothing to lose anymore in this relationship.
It’s already died a 1000 deaths.
We talk about deep things.. about how he values women now because I will no longer be married to a little boy anymore.
I still miss going out on dates and feeling special with someone.
I think I will pray about that and figure out what to do instead.
Because dating Charles again if I initiated any of that I would feel like I was starting this whole mess of Charles and NH again.
I am the romantic
I am the dater to those I am enamored with.
I am no longer those things with Charles.
I am almost done with my 100
The boy and I started a bunch of magnets to sell here at the market for tourists.
They are pretty cool looking.
Alright super tired..
Here’s to tomorrow..