I used too.
When Glasses (a friend) and Kendra put flamingos in my yard, and Charles baked me a cake right before my infusions for my birthday.. then two months later Kendra and Charles are sexting.. Gosh I hate them sometimes.. not you Glasses.. 🙂
When Charles what I thought finally cared about us spending time together and booked us a trip away after 13 year of marriage, took care of arrangement with kids, that time I enjoyed.. still felt awkward and weird.. with him.. but I just thought it’s probably we’ve never done this before so it’s different.
Little did I know he’s been fucking Kendra for 2 years by then..
Why take me on a trip? I don’t know.. why then.. guilt? Still doesn’t make any sense to me..
Maybe the most meaningful gift is I know my husband was okay for years being a fraud. And he will tell me and anyone else he wasn’t okay with being a fraud.. but to me that’s a default..
For if your not okay with something you will change it. .
Say NH is 220+ lbs.. somedays I’m okay with being overweight other days I’m not. I could change and give up Oreos and sugar but I don’t..
If I wanted to change I could.. but I don’t.. I don’t lie to myself and others posing as if I’m exercising, eating right and am like “I don’t know why I’m not losing any weight”..
Tears are aflowing right now..
I thought my marriage was such a gift..
I guess another meaningful gift is becoming wiser to not fall for disrespect ever from my husband again.. ever..
The gift of me.. maybe that’s the most meaningful..