I can actually say I love you to Charles and not feel like a fraud
Because I do love him, I love his body, I love how he is to our kids, I love our family
Now some would say I’m well on my way to reconciliation but I would disagree
I’m well on my way to not be a betrayed bitter asshole
That I can stand behind
Reconciling with Charles as in I want to be married to him??
Because really I want to be with someone I feel safe with
I don’t feel safe with Charles
I don’t feel committed to Charles
I do love him.
Sometimes I want to tell him these things
And I don’t not for fear of his response he’ll the door is that way and he knows it
But more because he doesn’t understand.. he thinks her I love you’s mean the same as his..
Which is so strange coming from a man who clearly knows that in this marital arrangement what one says and does can mean a multitude of things
Especially coming from his end.
Squish has lice and I always feel like I’m itching!!! 😳😳😳😳
He’s out of town and I’m with the cutest little lice monster ever
Lice are so gross but it’s a thing here in AK 😢
On to lice treatments, laundry, and life ❤️❤️❤️