Don’t you get it you are a variable?

I am thankful that I could communicate with him his status without sinning, calling names, screaming

I called him a variable 

He used to be a constant, but he is no longer that.

I do not trust him to not push this marriage aside for his own wants, desires 

Whenever he feels like playing footsie with someone else’s spouse.

Whatevs 

But realistically is this my bed and really I can accept that 

I chose the wrong husband I did that and I chose to put up with the disrespect, the distance, the self condemnation all in the name of marriage is work and we will find our way 

Nope he found his way into sex in Walmart parking lots 

I don’t want to break up my family. I can accept this lackluster love life to seek more fulfilling things of course. 

I can accept that still hurts but I can accept that

He didn’t like being called a variable 

He so badly wants to be a constant 

Bridge burnt in my eyes 

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