So we have a barista in our little town. And she is kind to us, anyways yesterday She confided that her husband/fiancé (I’m not entirely sure) is a cheater
I went for a spin! My heart broke for her!
And I talked with Charles in the car and basically called all cheaters scum and should be thrown in the cold Ocean to be food for whales (yes I know that isn’t a thing)
I apologized to Charles I also told him that I hate this world he took me too that I wanted no part in.
I hate being angry at stupid Christian books that see marriage as a science and that you can protect your marriage from your spouse being a dishonest slut
I hate that adults who commit to other adults are fucking cowards and cannot treat spouses with dignity and respect
I hate knowing that the last statement I just made is apparently too hard because it seems that affairs are the norm rather than the exception
I now want to be an exception however I find it will never be with him
I will start writing Charles letters about how I feel.
Because full honesty is too much and sometimes I’m mean
My honesty maybe correct but the delivery doesn’t treat Charles as a human sometimes
And he is
I’m quite bored in this marriage we did have sex after I blogged about it but it’s manly to keep from master bating to porn. I enjoy sex with Charles I’m still not in love with Charles.
I wonder going on year 4 if things will get better for us like statistics say 5 years it will get better
I’m not holding my breathe.
I’m over him so over him.
Bringing him to Samoa was more of a coparenting thing more than I wanted him there.
He was also a necessity he is so good at directions
something i praise him for
I praise him for a lot I’m just not in love with him and starting over with him is not fun
The newness of starting over with an adulterer is just lackLuster
I don’t want to go on dates with him
I am starting to plan a trip on antiversary day. A day I celebrate myself because being married to a claimed reformed cheater is not easy 😂😂😂😂
Well here’s to the day I have 7 children under my roof today and am enjoying life while Charles is on away on business! ❤❤❤❤